My wife questioned my ability - OK, not so much my ability, but my sanity - to do this.
You guys know I'm apolitical. I hold some liberal ideologies and some conservative ones. I'm very appreciative of Virginia's senior Senator, John Warner, and hope he continues to hold office as long as he wishes. However, I'm not at all a big fan of our junior Senator, George Allen. (Even you non-Virginians have probably heard of him; he's the guy at the center of the "macaca" flap. Oh, and he happens to up for re-election this fall.)
He is by no means a lock, but certainly a fairly safe bet to retain his seat. However, he is supposedly looking at a 2008 presidential candidacy which, frankly, scares the hell out of me.
So, with that in mind, here's my list of 500 people (in no particular order) I'd rather have as president than George Allen. (The list was originally 1,000, but I just can't go that far.)
1. Bill Frist
2. Mark Warner
3. Barack Obama
4. John Warner
5. Andy Card
6. Ed Rendell
7. Eliot Spitzer
8. Tom Kean
9. Arnold Schwarzenegger
10. Tim Kaine
11. Dianne Feinstein
12. Trent Lott
13. John McCain
14. Paul Kanjorski
15. Tom Davis
16. Lynne Abraham
17. Anthony Williams
18. Karl Rove
19. Jeb Bush
20. Douglas Wilder
21. Elaine Chao
22. Condy Rice
23. Michael Chertoff
24. John F. Hanosek
25. Bill Euille
26. Charles Getz
27. William O'Gurek
28. Wayne Nothstein
29. Lindsay Hunsicker
30. Jack Finn
31. Alexis Bayer
32. Steve Largent
33. Kim Hunter
34. Catherine O'Mara
35. Al Gore
36. Janet Reno
37. Jim Gibbons
38. Tony Blair
39. Mahmoud Ahmadinejad
40. Vladimir Putin
41. Vicente Fox
42. Brian Mulroney
43. Margaret Thatcher
44. Madeline Albright
45. Bob McDonnell
46. Robert Ehrlich
47. Michael Steele
48. Douglas Gansler
49. Doug Duncan
50. Jack Johnson
51. Josh Rales
52. Ben Cardin
53. Ross Perot
54. Gerald Ford
55. George H.W. Bush
56. George W. Bush
57. Dick Cheney
58. Don Rumsfeld
59. Michael Dukakis
60. Jimmy Carter
61. Rudolph Guiliani
62. Ed Koch
63. Tom Ridge
64. Arlen Specter
65. John Murtha
66. Don Sherwood
67. Wilson Goode
68. Henry Kissinger
69. Colin Powell
70. Alan Greenspan
71. Ben Bernanke
72. Dick Thornburgh
73. Norman Mineta
74. Tom Thune
75. Tom Daschle
76. Sean Richardson
77. Glee Smith
78. Celia Sims
79. Jen Swenson
80. Lindsay Morris
81. Kenny Guinn
82. Jim McGreevey
83. Andrew MacDonald
84. Ludwig P. Gaines
85. K. Rob Krupicka
86. Timothy Lovain
87. Del Pepper
88. Paul Smedberg
89. Gary Olson
90. John V. Reynolds
91. Hwa Yol Jung
92. J. Patrick Dobel
93. Laura Evans
94. May Kay Gugerty
95. Paul Hill
96. Sanjeev Kaghram
97. Stephen Page
98. Steven Rathgeb Smith
99. Brewster C. Denny
100. William M. Zumeta
101. Donovan McNabb
102. Donte Stallworth
103. Mark Brunell
104. Willie Parker
105. Brad Johnson
106. Hines Ward
107. Bill Cowher
108. Joe Gibbs
109. Jeremiah Trotter
110. Jevon Kearse
111. Brian Dawkins
112. Reggie Brown
113. Brian Westbrook
114. Thomas Tapeh
115. L.J. Smith
116. Jon Runyan
117. Shawn Andrews
118. Jamaal Jackson
119. Todd Herremans
120. William Thomas
121. Darren Howard
122. Mike Patterson
123. Darwin Walker
124. Dhani Jones
125. Matt McCoy
126. Roderick Hood
127. Lito Sheppard
128. Sheldon Brown
129. Michael Lewis
130. David Akers
131. Dirk Johnson
132. Bill Parcells
133. Mike Holmgren
134. Tom Brady
135. Tedy Bruschi
136. Chad Pennington
137. Wayne Chrebet
138. Ronnie Brown
139. Junior Seau
140. Daunte Culpepper
141. Willis McGahee
142. Takeo Spikes
143. Steve McNair
144. Carson Palmer
145. Chad Johnson
146. T.J. Houshmanzadeh
147. Romeo Crennel
148. Gary Kubiak
149. David Carr
150. Dwight Freeney
151. Robert Mathis
152. Matt Jones
153. Jack Del Rio
154. Jeff Fisher
155. Billy Volek
156. Jay Cutler
157. Trent Green
158. Priest Holmes
159. Larry Johnson
160. Randy Moss
161. LaDainian Tomlinson
162. Antonio Gates
163. Marty Schottenheimer
164. Renaldo Wynn
165. Jon Jansen
166. Shawn Springs
167. Tom Coughlin
168. Michael Strahan
169. Lovie Smith
170. Mike Brown
171. Muhsin Muhammad
172. Steve Hutchinson
173. Darren Sharper
174. Warrick Dunn
175. Jim Mora Jr.
176. Keith Brooking
177. Reggie Bush
178. Sean Payton
179. Jake Delhomme
180. Kris Jenkins
181. Cadillac Williams
182. Ronde Barber
183. Derrick Brooks
184. Matt Leinart
185. Larry Fitzgerald
186. Anquan Boldin
187. Vernon Davis
188. Mike Nolan
189. Shaun Alexander
190. Walter Jones
191. Scott Linehan
192. Torry Holt
193. Tiki Barber
194. Keenan McCardell
195. Casey Rabach
196. Roy Williams (DAL)
197. Joey Porter
198. Marcus Washington
199. Jeremy Bloom
200. Tom Heckert
201. Tommy Bowden
202. Bobby Bowden
203. Ralph Friedgen
204. Chuck Amato
205. Chan Gailey
206. Larry Coker
207. John Bunting
208. Frank Beamer
209. Randy Edsall
210. Bobby Petrino
211. Dave Wannstedt
212. Greg Schiano
213. Rich Rodriguez
214. Kirk Ferentz
215. Joe Paterno
216. Barry Alvarez
217. Mike Mangino
218. Bill Callahan
219. Bob Stoops
220. Mack Brown
221. Charlie Weis
222. Mike Stopps
223. Dirk Koetter
224. Jeff Tedford
225. Mike Bellotti
226. Mike Riley
227. Pete Carroll
228. Walt Harris
229. Pat Fitzgerald
230. Karl Dorrell
231. Tyrone Willingham
232. Bill Doba
233. Urban Meyer
234. Mark Richt
235. Steve Spurrier
236. Phil Fulmer
237. Houston Nutt
238. Tommy Tuberville
239. Les Miles
240. Sylvester Croom
241. Dick Anderson
242. Tom Bradley
243. Galen Hall
244. Larry Johnson
245. Bill Kenney
246. Mike McQueary
247. Brian Norwood
248. Jay Paterno
249. Ron Vanderlinden
250. John Thomas
251. Scot Dapp
252. Gary Martell
253. Jeff Pukszyn
254. Steve Gordy
255. Kurt Poling
256. Fran Meagher
257. Adam Stauffer
258. Joe Pollock
259. Jim Newhard
260. Andy Cerco
261. Drew DiGiacinto
262. Jafar Williams
263. Jim Larranaga
264. Karl Hobbs
265. John Chaney
266. Gary Williams
267. Roy Williams (UNC)
268. Seth Greenberg
269. Tom Izzo
270. Jeff Capel
271. Lorenzo Romar
272. Billy Donovan
273. Ben Howland
274. Ed Little
275. John Makuvek
276. Jim Walker
277. Doug Pollard
278. Mary Beth Spirk
279. John Byrne
280. Ron Cardinal
281. Gary Williams (my old OL coach at Moravian, not the one mentioned earlier)
282. Chris Ault
283. Terry Donahue
284. Vince Dooley
285. Pat Dye
286. LaVell Edwards
287. John Gagliardi
288. Don James
289. Don Nehlen
290. Tubby Raymond
291. George Welsh
292. Jim Beoheim
293. Lou Carnesecca
294. Pete Carrill
295. Lute Olsen
296. Dean Smith
297. Pat Summitt
298. Denny Crum
299. Bob Knight
300. John Thompson
301. Sam Perlozzo
302. Jason Varitek
303. Jon Papelbon
304. Derek Jeter
305. Randy Johnson
306. Joe Torre
307. Justin Verlander
308. Jeremy Bonderman
309. Nate Robertson
310. Joe Mauer
311. Torii Hunter
312. Howie Kendrick
313. Adam Kennedy
314. Mike Socscia
315. Dallas McPherson
316. Barry Zito
317. Billy Beane
318. Raul Ibanez
319. Brad Wilkerson
320. Michael Young
321. Hank Blalock
322. Jeff Francoeur
323. Chipper Jones
324. Bobby Cox
325. Dontrelle Willis
326. Dan Uggla
327. Reggie Abercrombie
328. David Wright
329. Lastings Milledge
330. Nick Johnson
331. Brian Schneider
332. Kerry Wood
333. Mark Prior
334. Juan Pierre
335. Bronson Arroyo
336. Adam Dunn
337. Chris Denorfia
338. Roy Oswalt
339. Roger Clemens
340. Andy Pettitte
341. Lance Berkman
342. Morgan Ensberg
343. Ben Sheets
344. Laynce Nix
345. Geoff Jenkins
346. Jack Wilson
347. Chris Carpenter
348. Chris Duncan
349. Skip Schumaker
350. Brandon Webb
351. Chris Counsell
352. Luis Gonzalez
353. Brad Helton
354. Clint Barmes
355. Choo Freeman
356. Andre Ethier
357. Nomar Garciaparra
358. Jeff Kent
359. Jake Peavy
360. Khalil Greene
361. Russell Branyan
362. Steve Kline
363. Moises Alou
364. Jason Schmidt
365. Aaron Fultz
366. Geoff Geary
367. Tom Gordon
368. Cole Hamels
369. Jon Leiber
370. Ryan Madson
371. Jamie Moyer
372. Arthur Rhodes
373. Randy Wolf
374. Chris Coste
375. Mike Leiberthal
376. Jeff Conine
377. Ryan Howard
378. Jimmy Rollins
379. Chase Utley
380. Michael Bourn
381. David Dellucci
382. Shane Victorino
383. Aaron Rowand
384. Charlie Manuel
385. Frank Robinson
386. Joe Girardi
387. John Gibbons
388. Jim Leyland
389. Willie Randolph
390. Dusty Baker
391. Jerry Narron
392. Jim Tracy
393. Joe Maddon
394. Ron Gardenhire
395. Mike Hargrove
396. Buck Showalter
397. Ned Yost
398. Tony LaRussa
399. Clint Hurdle
400. Mike Piazza
401. Eminem
402. 50 Cent
403. Blackie Lawless
404. Tom Araya
405. Brad Garrett
406. Lewis Black
407. Ron White
408. Russell Crowe
409. Bob Ley
410. Michael Wilbon
411. Charles Barkley
412. Gnarls Barkley
413. Paul Zimmerman
414. Jayski
415. David Poole
416. Moddy
417. Webby
418. Riki Rachtman
419. Coolguy
420. Chuck D
421. LL Cool J
422. Paul Stanley
423. John Force
424. Mike Rowe
425. Jason Whitlock
426. Alan Schwarz
427. Dick Yuengling
428. Andrew Jackson errr, Peter Gammons
429. Paul Tagliabue
430. Chuck Norris
431. Leon Harris
432. Jim Gardner
433. Cecily Tynan
434. Kevin Smith
435. Sarah Fraser
436. Bob Marbourg
437. Clint Eastwood
438. Snoop Dogg
439. Nelly
440. Jay-Z
441. Brad Nessler
442. Fred Funk
443. Tiger Woods
444. Soledad O'Brien
445. Daryn Kagan
446. Suzanne Malveaux
447. Mike Helton
448. Jeff Burton
449. Jim Hunter
450. Joe White
451. Tom Hanks
452. David Hasselhoff
453. Gene Hackman
454. James Earl Jones
455. Darius Rucker
456. DCRTV Dave
457. Bob Dylan
458. Bob Marley (the comedian)
459. Morgan Freeman
460. Harry Shearer
461. Chris Rock
462. Jenna Jameson
463. Casey Kasem
464. Wolf Blitzer (but not if Jack Cafferty was veep)
465. Tony Stewart
466. Kevin Harvick
467. Mrs. Robinson
468. David Robinson
469. Tom Doak
470. Pete Dye
471. Rees Jones
472. Kevin Bacon
473. Diedrich Bader
474. Sandra Bullock
475. Dave Chappelle
476. Tina Fey
477. Alyson Hanigan
478. Sherman Hemsley
479. Rob Lowe
480. Mackenzie Phillips
481. Pink
482. Henry Rollins
483. Ben Stein
484. Wanda Sykes
485. GE Smith
486. DangerMouse
487. Hank Hill
488. Homer Simpson
489. Beavis
490. Butt-Head
491. Tom
492. Jerry
493. Bugs Bunny
494. Papa Smurf
495. Secret Squirrel
496. Droopy
497. Barney Gumble
498. Betty Rubble
499. Jane Jetson
500. Grace the Cat
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